a real surprise when u got energy boosted up in the middle of the night. i seriously got to get rid this Red Bull addiction (i found another energy booster: turkish coffee, trust me. it'll get you goin on and on and on... and so on and so forth and on).
i find myself amazed as well as dazed at how clean my room is. i havent slept the whole day, its usually right off to bed after work till an hour or so before breaking fast. however, i have been really productive today. so much so i am awed at the fact that i could pull all this up in just half a day.
cleaning my room would usually take a hefty time (by that i mean a very long time... okay, a week) it started out with a small speck of dust... then i moved over to my mound of laundry that was as high as Everest. cold and there... with the stinking visual effects. so horrible that it not even a fly would dare to cross over. yeah, i am dirty. off i went doing the laundry. and i even walked up and down the stairs coz the lift was occupied most of the time. and in between i even had time to prep food for breaking fast.
after eating (and several cans of Red Bull) i started to rocket off. i felt like a human bunny rabbit, only bigger and stronger (oh yeah). cooking and cleaning up, done. laundry, done. and the best part of all, folding up my clothes. as of the first t-shirt i folded, i heard applause (its the Red Bull effect, definitely). suddenly i went berserk. i even folded up my undies! how fantastic (and pathetic) is that???
my room looked huge. i remember a familiar voice in my head... 'its like your front lawn. you mow it up and it looks bigger!'. i could do summersaults without hesitation. heck, even fit a Mini Cooper with the Big Fat Bastard standing outside.
and now i cant sleep. i've surfed every corner of the internet. yes, every corner. the one that your thinking as well. yes, i am human after all.
and in the moment of insanity, i remembered home. i remembered how my small family would spend the whole night prepping for the end of Ramadhan and the beginning of Syawal. i just realized that this would be the second Syawal i celebrate alone. i dont hear any fireworks cracking. i dont hear kids shouting and singing annoying Hari Raya songs. worse of all, i dont see my parents as well as my other half... i am still alone. just me, my Spongebob and Doraemon pillow close by my side. so what? can't i have my own little bundle of joy?
turned my tv off as well as the lights, traced back to my bed and started to lie down but hesitated and continued to walk to my window. standing near the window, under a vague light of the moon surrounded by the darkness of nothingess, i looked out to the apartment buildings nearby. a few lights still turned on. the sound of the tram rumbling by. small dark figures walking pass by on the streets withe their dogs barking happily by their side. a slight breeze of the cold autumn night wind slowly started gently caressing my face. in the moment of small insanity, i started to feel what i tried not feel for quite a while. missing everyone back in Brunei. i love you all. i miss you all terribly. Allah bless you all... thats the only largely small effort that i could do when everyone is out of reach. stretched out my hand and slowly bringing it up to my face, i started picking my nose and decided to blog again. hm? did the nose picking spoiled such good composition? i doubt it. you all approve of it since all of you are smiling. keep smiling. coz i am. Allah bless you too.